April 13, 2017

Dear queen of a disappeared kingdom,


I am your sister, flesh of your flesh, blood of your blood, or maybe I was.
I could ask you many things, but actually I know the answers.
You’ve gone. You’ve gone and I just have to deal with it. I’ve been trying for years, but I can’t, ok? When we were kids we talked, don’t know, walking to school, and people turned their head to watch us, bacause we were so bright. Together we were a powerful, bright flame, and I am feeling like – I’m going to, forever – I’m feeling like ash.
I want to be alive. I want to grow up and stop being so stupid, a silly crying little girl, and I’m trying with all my forces to do so, but the memory of you hits me and I fall. Every damned time. You said you won’t leave me. You said we’ll be together forever, did you remember? Oh so much hypocrit to say, I also said a lot of things, but it’s like if I don’t throw away the memories I remain like this forever, and if I do I feel empty.
It has no sense.
I don’t want to be a weight for people.
If I travel through the ghosts, maybe I’ll find your soul.

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